*frustrated*

hey, are we back to just being normal friends?
this question again? i was busy the past few days..
you know why? because i don't know what i actually feel about you..one minute il be missing you like crazy, but the next moment im like whatever you know. thats why i ask, don't get irritated okies? :)

no reply means you dont feel the same way i do.
so just tell me, why you want to keep me dangling there like a marionette?

its different if you and i are in the same position where we only have each other to think about, with no other exes casting a shadow over us.
but i know deep down in your heart, she is still there.
oddly, i am not upset that she is, im just saying, i dont like to share..
you are first and foremost my friend. one of my closest.
i care alot about what you are doing, and how you've been.

so its okay if you tell me that things are back to what it was.

because when you do, it makes life so much easier.
we would know our boundaries, and when i do miss you- i would know its only because i miss you as my friend, and not confuse it with anything else. i wont feel hurt if you dont reply my msgs. i wont be glancing at my phone every 3 minutes to see if you had replied.
you like to see me that way is it huh sayang?

i dont. i didnt just get out of a relationship just to stumble into another thats somewhat similar.

if however you tell me about how you really feel, then at least i dont have to keep on guessing all the time. its really unfair, how can you treat your best friend like this?

i do understand that perhaps in not defining things, its better. you dont want to spoil things by interpreting everything so literally all the time.
but at this point in time, i need to be clear as to what is it you want.
a fling?
a rebound?
a back up?
a once in a while thing?
what?

when i feel like want to manja here and there, you tak layan langsung.
then when im in friend-mode you will suddenly msg something sweet.
we'd be walking together but we might as well be strangers looking at the giant gap between us.
but after that, its a different story.

i dont want to "fall-in-love" with you just because ive gotten used to you being like this okay?

make up your mind la.

so that i know. so that MY feelings wont get hurt in the process.
so i guess il end it, and i wont tell you.